| ok. i haven't written anything in here for a while. xanga is like my time to reflect on things, and, well, things have been pretty good. so i guess there hasn't been a need to reflect so much.
partially writing in here, because i don't think many people will read it. i'm partially also writing in here because i want someone to read this. someone to listen to me gripe about how disappointing life can be sometimes. nothing big. i mean. nothing's really happened. just the usual. disappointed in friends. sometimes i wish i had no expectations for friends, then i'd never be disappointed. it seems like i'm disappointed a lot, so maybe that means i just have unrealistic expectations? great. how to undo that... ironically, my disappointment doesn't even stem from my own experience. wow. vicarious disappointment, how depressing. if only i was less sympathetic, more selfish, and had no conscience. i think the choices in life would be a lot easier. addendum. maybe i'd rather be the only person on this world and instead of interacting with people, i would just have 100 dogs in place of friends. that sounds like a good alternative if you ask me.
i'm also disappointed in people. just people in general. i know there's a lot of good people out there in the world. people who truly want to do good things. people who care and want to positively impact the world around them. i always have to keep telling myself that, because otherwise, i get pissed off at the crap that goes on and the stupid things that people do. i wish i could just write everyone off and say that people in the world are evil and cause pain and suffering to those around them. everyone has their story though right? everyone has excuses? i'm tired of hearing those. seriously. i just want people to own up to what they do. to apologize. if you ask me, people need to accept their own actions instead of rationalizing everthing. it's so damn annoying. people are so selfish, self-righteous, act and don't think about the impact that they have on the people around them. or even bettter, they don't care. i have to say, i'm definitely guilty of this. acting and disregarding even those i care about the most.
oh. how ironic it is to be human. to act selfishly and, at the same time, to be completely cognizant of what is right and wrong.
this probably didn't make sense at all. but whatevas. i just wanted to stand at the edge of a canyon in the middle of the night and yell out to into the abyss.
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| xanga is dying. how sad. i think i know like 3 people who actually write it in now...  or maybe 4, if i include myself... |
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| this round of recruiting has ended, with success! yay! hopefully this will be the last job switch for a while... the best recruiting advice i've ever received -- at a time when i really needed it:
u gotta be able to sellthat's what an interview is u selling yourself ur gonna highlight your good stuff and spin your bad stuff to make it sound less bad stay sharp be confident happy. YAY :] now...to tell work bleh. |
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| so close yet SO FAR...ughh... waiting. waiting... waiting. waitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaiting waitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaiting waitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaitingwaiting you get the point.... |
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| blah. waiting sucks.  |
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